Oooh, now this is a juicy topic - thank you for tackling it with such nuance, Laura!
The "Let Them" poem was never on my radar, and when I read the outlines of this story, it initially felt like an overreaction to me. Then I read about the trademark part, and that changed my reaction from "meh" to "hmm, this is sketchy." Even if Robbins really had no idea, offering some kind of hand-up to a less-known writer just seems like the right and generous thing to do. The opposite of punching down, you know?
And since you mentioned Gretchen Rubin, I have two stories for you. "The Happiness Project" came out in 2009, when my daughter was a baby and I was just starting work on my own book about finding happiness in motherhood, which was published in 2011. I wasn't reading a lot of self-help outside of the motherhood genre at the time (heck, as the mother of five kids including a newborn I wasn't reading a lot of books, period) so while I knew about Gretchen's work I hadn't yet read the book when my publisher sent her a copy of my book to hopefully blurb, which she very graciously did. Imagine my horror when I read her book - after my manuscript was completed - and saw that one of my chapter titles - "Make Your Bed" - was a tip that factored heavily in her book. I promise you, I did not lift that idea from her, or any other writer. Or...did I? I had in fact been noticing for years that making my bed in the morning helped me feel like a functional human being during a time that I was surrounded in kid chaos, but maybe both Gretchen and I got the idea from another writer at the same time years earlier? Or, the idea was just in the water? Who knows. Anyway, I had the opportunity to connect with Gretchen multiple times in the years after my book released and she was always kind and gracious, so I figured she didn't hold it against me.
AND THEN...when I was working on my most recent book about parenting older kids, I was making my blurb request list and Gretchen was on it...when I saw that she had written a fantastic essay for The Atlantic on a similar topic. For a moment I almost let that coincidence stop me from asking, lol. But I got over it, and she graciously agreed to read my newest book too (and ultimately wound up blurbing it). I guess my point is that whether it's a simple mistake, credit getting overlooked, or zeitgeist, it can happen in either direction. Me writing about the same topic as Gretchen Rubin isn't likely to harm her career, as her audience is so much bigger than mine. But because her audience is so much bigger than mine, her generosity CAN help me. For Cassie Phillips' sake, I wish Mel had been as gracious to Cassie as Gretchen was to me. And actually, I wish that for Mel's sake too, because something tells me it feels really yucky to have this out there, and to know you've caused harm whether intentionally or not, harm that you COULD reverse, and to instead feel you must double-down.
This comment is already really long so I'll just add one more thing. I've been writing for publication for nigh on twenty five years, and in spite of the fact that stuff like this sometimes does happen, one of the things I hate hearing the most from writers is that they won't put their ideas out there because they're afraid they'll get "stolen." Like...what is the other option? Sit on it for the rest of your life? Wait for it to be "perfect" so you can release it on the world and experience immediate fame and success? El oh el, that is not how it works, my friends! Producing a creative work is one small part inspiration and one giant part execution and holding back to protect yourself just stagnates the flow.
This is a great story! Gretchen really IS generous. She agreed to be on my podcast over three years ago when I was just starting out in the podcast world. Most bigger-name authors would have said no, but Gretchen did not hesitate (or if she did, she certainly didn't let me know that).
I love that so much, Nina! It doesn't surprise me at all. Gee, it's almost as though one of the secrets to being happy is...to be kind and generous to others, mm?
Recently I read Alicia Drake’s excellent biography of Yves Saint Laurent and Karl Lagerfeld, where she tells the story of a young YSL sketching a collection that was almost identical to the one Dior was about to release. YSL was still a student, had never met Dior, and in fact no one had seen Dior’s soon-to-be announced work. The rest of the story goes that YSL’s teacher recommended him to Dior, who hired him immediately, because he really was a creative mind who could read the zeitgeist / had his finger on the pulse.
I love that story, loved the Gilbert anecdote in her book too, and I do think some people have that talent. I also think, as you pointed you, that in the self-help sphere there’s a lot of mutual inspiration and “yes, and” going around. Which is so great! But yeah, it also doesn’t hurt to mention where your inspiration comes from, especially if you’re someone with a fairly large following and who can help an artist who maybe hasn’t made it as big..
The YSL story makes me think that we all get influenced by our times. I think everything collectively in the zeitgeist was pushing clothes in the direction that Lagerfeld and YSL were going. We get tired of what was before and move to the new thing and end up rallying around something. Miniskirts, wide leg, skinny jeans, whatever.
Culture influences us and we influence culture. It's a circle that feeds itself.
Wait I can't seem to find the book you're referencing, is it this one? Will you post a link or the full title if you get a chance? https://amzn.to/41ajZSr
Here’s the book: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/49098.The_Beautiful_Fall It’s very detailed, with no pictures (I did so much googling of collections..) but I LOVED it. I read it right after visiting the Dior and YSL museums in Paris and I got so much more out of my visits retrospectively.
The writing is also respectful both YSL and Lagerfeld even when Drake mentions their flaws, in case you share my pet peeve for catty biographies! (I’m still trying to digest that recent ‘Didion & Babitz’ book, but that’s another topic for another day haha)
Fabulous piece, Laura! I just found out about the controversy the other day.
A few thoughts:
If the roles were reversed and an unknown woman tried to publish her let them poem, after Mel dropped her widely successful book, people would have laughed at her for “taking Mel’s idea.” And she probably wouldn’t have been published.
Like it or not, I agree there’s some latitude for a person taking an idea already out there and repackaging it (based upon their fame).
To me, it seems quite obvious that Mel’s daughter said something (not unique) to her, “Let them,” and Mel realized she had a perfect new nonfiction sound bite. She did some research to find some factual basis for the theory, used some of her personal stories, and hired a team of great lawyers to get around any legal claim. She’s now bragging that her book was one of the largest nonfiction launches ever (heard her on Prof G) and will make a gazillion dollars. I’d be OK with all of this, as long as she gave a nod to that poem and its creator. She could have done all the same stuff I mentioned above and brought up another woman! But she didn’t, and to me that speaks volumes. With the help of all the lawyers money can buy (I’m a lawyer too, but I doubt Mel did IP Law, I don’t even know if she practiced long; if she didn’t do IP, she didn’t have the inherent knowledge, she hired it out) she ran with the idea and insulated herself from suit. Which to me makes her behavior kind of heinous.
It's so true that the "zeitgeist" argument doesn't work both ways. FOR SURE when people stumble across Cassie Phillips's poem now, they'll assume it's a ripoff of Mel Robbins' theory instead of ever jumping to the conclusion that the poem came first. It's been interesting to see people post the receipts on Cassie's work dating back to at least 2019, but I fear it won't matter much. Some machines are too big.
I was a little on the fence about Mel's work before, because I felt it was too ableist and just too "pick yourself up and wash your face" (no pun intended on the girl, wash your face as it relates to this piece). I'm really turned off by her now. The work feels hackish.
I agree with you completely. What is so off putting to me is that she failed to acknowledge Cassie in her book or in any podcast she's been on. I feel very differently about her now that I see more of her character (or lack thereof).
Yes and the 2 movies about pigs in the 90s - Babe and Gordy. I was so confused about this as a kid.
Also Dante’s Peak and Volcano, The Prestige & The Illusionist, it appears this has been happening for as long as movies have been made: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_films
This is really encouraging to me. Just to know it’s a real and valid question for people like you who’ve published books and have lots of ideas that people listen to! I’ve been working on a book and recently found out about a book with a very similar title and basically the same idea as mine. I was devastated at first but my sister reminded me that my words need to be heard as well and my perspective will still be my own.
I like the concept that ideas will make it into the world regardless of who brings them into being!
yes please put your message into the world even if you think it's been done before. avoiding any type of plagiarism, of course, I really do believe that different voices speaking to a topic will land on the right ears to hear them.
Excellent essay and much to consider. I kept thinking about the Jo Jo Moyes and Kim Richardson plagiarism accusations while reading it. Also, I recall that Helen Keller was accused of plagiarism. Can’t remember the details, so sounds like my rabbit hole for the day.
Maybe Robbins felt that the theory she built upon Cassie’s foundation was worthy of sole credit. It seems so simple to provide a credit, a mention (or even an honoring) of the original poem, and a small percentage of profits. It also seems like that sort of generosity or abundance mindset would align with the type of work Robbins promotes. I wonder how Fair Use laws come into play, if at all. I also wonder who was advising Robbins; what role did the publisher play in the decision not to credit Cassie?
I think one of the things that bothers me the most about this one is the genre it falls into. On the one hand, self-help ideas are VERY zeitgeist-y and a lot of people end up creating similar messages. On the other hand, you're right that withholding credit (even just a small nod) seems in opposition to everything else about Mel Robbins's brand. (And the love and light of personal development and inspirational books in general.)
I have often pondered this, when a thought occurred to me and then I started to see other people posting similar things online. Were we all guided to the same thought path by the similar sources we were reading? Did I read someone else's tweet about it, forget, and claim the thought as my own? Is it just the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon? I have also seen influencers start seamlessly incorporating ideas that I mentioned in their comments (for example, comparing a certain decluttering method to gardening) that I hadn't heard them mention before and wondered if they stole my idea without even a shoutout... and then been appalled at my own delusions of grandeur.
Oooh this IS a juicy topic! I started reading the Robbins book, caught wind of the controversy, and then returned my library hold b/c something felt icky about the situation. Your thorough research here affirms for me why I didn't want to read the book. To me, there is a level of specificity to both the content + the trademark attempt, that makes me feel like this IS a stolen idea—or, at least, the ex-journalist in me would have felt too guilty to pursue it had I been in her shoes! An equivalent in my mind would be like, her putting out a book called "Good Bones" and then claiming she had never read or heard of Maggie Smith's poem by the same name.
Regardless, I hope we bring this up when we meet to discuss Colored Television, because THAT is a book that presses its whole mulatto hand down on the topic of "who got there first" re art and ideas.
I really like thinking about this! (I also love that you are writing more essays!) It is hard not to notice these trends and of course there have been times when I have rolled my eyes to myself when someone's work seems to be piggybacking off the "trendy" things being published. But, I have also noticed times when several similar ideas are published in books or podcasts at virtually the same time. It does seem that sometimes there is an energy of some sort that points people in the same direction of learning. As a person of faith, I notice this a lot in the Christian writing space. When this happens in any arena, I just pay attention. It seems like there is an idea that is trying to push forward and I probably have something to learn from it.
I love this generous way of thinking about it, that sometimes it's the idea itself that wants to be seen, known, and shared, and the details of who is spreading the message is arbitrary. That tracks with what Elizabeth Gilbert was saying, too.
I have wondered about this for television. Three shows about firefighters all of a sudden? Weird. I also love that idea from Big Magic that these ideas are circling around trying to find a willing partner to come to life. It also makes me wonder are ideas bigger than credit? Native Americans had no concept that land could be "owned". Maybe it's the same for ideas? We are the stewards of the ideas - not the owners. Credit is slippery because ideas are bigger than that. But to the Mel Robbins' point, she absolutely should have given credit. Cassidy should have been next to her in the Oprah interview. Honoring your inspiration doesn't take away from your authorship.
Longform Laura is great and thought-provoking. I love this Substack. Have you read Austin Kleon's Stealing Like An Artist? It's so good and all about how our ideas are resting on the backs of our mentors--that it's OK and part of the creative process because we are all unique and so our creations can't be identical. BUT in this case, MR surely had to be aware that someone else had coined the phrase. Yes, she makes it her own, but an acknowledgment would be gracious and transparent so we trust her work. On the other hand, I don't think it's uncommon for us to absorb ideas and sayings that are already swirling around in our circles of personal and online influence. It's kind of like when we spend a lot of time with certain people, we might begin using some of their language, accent, or body movements without even trying. Since we live in an age of constant information coming at us, I bet it happens more than we think. For example, the idea of 20-minute reading timers has been around for decades among educators. There are even bookmarks with timers on them to encourage kids to read etc. etc. To my knowledge, you're not in teacher circles, but good ideas come to smart people and you have your unique LT version of it which is good and inspiring. I like where you land--being generous with ideas, sharing them, not coming from a place of scarcity, but abundance. I hope MR reads your article.
Laura this was such an excellent, nuanced take. I've sent it along to my writing group and many others. I've had sort of the opposite worry in my writing career. Meaning--I've been writing about friendship since 2014, long before some of the newer books have come out. It was always an internet column in the first 7 years, then in 2021 I started the podcast, Dear Nina. But because I never put my ideas in a book, I always worry that the newer, bigger-name authors will think I lifted something of theirs in episodes, etc. Meanwhile, I've been writing about these things for over a decade!!
HOWEVER, there really is nothing "new" in the topic of friendship (as you know too!), which is why I would never accuse someone who wrote about friendship after I did of plagiarizing me. We all have our different styles of delivering common sense ideas. Still, every time a new friendship book comes out, I worry that someone will see ME as unoriginal despite my work coming first.
This is all just a long way of saying I think about these things a lot, and I also think about that moment in Big Magic and how lovely it is that Gilbert and Patchett became friends and not professional rivals-- a lesson for all of us. (This is not to say that Cassie does not have genuine, rightful beef with Mel attempting the trademark. I think that whole thing could have been handled with attribution and permission from the get go and avoided this whole mess. Another lesson for all of us!)
It's so funny, Nina, I thought about the topic of friendship and my own book AFTER I'd already finished writing this piece and it was already so long I didn't include that commentary but yes, I definitely had these thoughts as "friendship" is having a zeitgeist moment.
I never thought it about it in terms of plagiary with The Life Council, more like worrying that there were too many books about friendship coming out all at the same time, and would my book get lost in friendship fatigue. So far so good 😂 and as you know, people remain eager to talk about these relationships.
I don’t listen much anymore but every year on her podcast GR sets an intention/hashtag for the year. Like go outside for 20 in (19)20. Write 24 in 24. I think she did the reading one a few years back too. (These are examples I don’t remember which year she did which) Just saying it wasn’t always about reading
Her ideas were also used again - maybe 10 years ago I read her book Better than Before, and learned a lot about habits. A few years ago the book Atomic Habits came out and I almost thought I had read the book before, because it was so similar to Gretchen’s. And as far as I know A.H. went on to be a much bigger success than hers, and I don’t think she was given any credit. But maybe they weren’t original ideas either? I don’t know. It’s all so interesting.
I didn’t love Mel’s book but I liked some of it - when I learned about the poem I was kind of disgusted and disappointed.
oh yes, I know Gretchen Rubin does these challenges and they're great! She's great. Also reading more (and reading challenges) are just not that original of an idea, there's no way on earth I would ever try to take credit for that.
I also love that part in Big Magic about idea transference. I heard Mel on Oprah’s podcast but the idea doesn’t resonate deeply for me maybe because I’m not at all a people pleaser. However I see all over the internet and even in South Africa and Australia how this concept is being loved by people and I am very sad that Mel didn’t credit or give a nod to Cassie. More importantly I love the way you wrote about this, Laura, with nuance and curiosity 🩷
A few years ago I created a campaign for our yearly trade show (beauty industry) called No Expiration Beauty that focused on beauty at all ages and it was very moving and powerful (and yes, I’m bragging but it’s true). The agency that executed it for us then went on to do a similar campaign for our competitor using my idea. This is also how it happens. Not everyone is ethical.
Oooh, now this is a juicy topic - thank you for tackling it with such nuance, Laura!
The "Let Them" poem was never on my radar, and when I read the outlines of this story, it initially felt like an overreaction to me. Then I read about the trademark part, and that changed my reaction from "meh" to "hmm, this is sketchy." Even if Robbins really had no idea, offering some kind of hand-up to a less-known writer just seems like the right and generous thing to do. The opposite of punching down, you know?
And since you mentioned Gretchen Rubin, I have two stories for you. "The Happiness Project" came out in 2009, when my daughter was a baby and I was just starting work on my own book about finding happiness in motherhood, which was published in 2011. I wasn't reading a lot of self-help outside of the motherhood genre at the time (heck, as the mother of five kids including a newborn I wasn't reading a lot of books, period) so while I knew about Gretchen's work I hadn't yet read the book when my publisher sent her a copy of my book to hopefully blurb, which she very graciously did. Imagine my horror when I read her book - after my manuscript was completed - and saw that one of my chapter titles - "Make Your Bed" - was a tip that factored heavily in her book. I promise you, I did not lift that idea from her, or any other writer. Or...did I? I had in fact been noticing for years that making my bed in the morning helped me feel like a functional human being during a time that I was surrounded in kid chaos, but maybe both Gretchen and I got the idea from another writer at the same time years earlier? Or, the idea was just in the water? Who knows. Anyway, I had the opportunity to connect with Gretchen multiple times in the years after my book released and she was always kind and gracious, so I figured she didn't hold it against me.
AND THEN...when I was working on my most recent book about parenting older kids, I was making my blurb request list and Gretchen was on it...when I saw that she had written a fantastic essay for The Atlantic on a similar topic. For a moment I almost let that coincidence stop me from asking, lol. But I got over it, and she graciously agreed to read my newest book too (and ultimately wound up blurbing it). I guess my point is that whether it's a simple mistake, credit getting overlooked, or zeitgeist, it can happen in either direction. Me writing about the same topic as Gretchen Rubin isn't likely to harm her career, as her audience is so much bigger than mine. But because her audience is so much bigger than mine, her generosity CAN help me. For Cassie Phillips' sake, I wish Mel had been as gracious to Cassie as Gretchen was to me. And actually, I wish that for Mel's sake too, because something tells me it feels really yucky to have this out there, and to know you've caused harm whether intentionally or not, harm that you COULD reverse, and to instead feel you must double-down.
This comment is already really long so I'll just add one more thing. I've been writing for publication for nigh on twenty five years, and in spite of the fact that stuff like this sometimes does happen, one of the things I hate hearing the most from writers is that they won't put their ideas out there because they're afraid they'll get "stolen." Like...what is the other option? Sit on it for the rest of your life? Wait for it to be "perfect" so you can release it on the world and experience immediate fame and success? El oh el, that is not how it works, my friends! Producing a creative work is one small part inspiration and one giant part execution and holding back to protect yourself just stagnates the flow.
I love so many aspects of this comment, but especially the stories about Gretchen. What a class act. Nothing but respect for her and her work.
This is a great story! Gretchen really IS generous. She agreed to be on my podcast over three years ago when I was just starting out in the podcast world. Most bigger-name authors would have said no, but Gretchen did not hesitate (or if she did, she certainly didn't let me know that).
I love that so much, Nina! It doesn't surprise me at all. Gee, it's almost as though one of the secrets to being happy is...to be kind and generous to others, mm?
Yes! And to be collaborative not competitive. She really does a stellar job of that.
Recently I read Alicia Drake’s excellent biography of Yves Saint Laurent and Karl Lagerfeld, where she tells the story of a young YSL sketching a collection that was almost identical to the one Dior was about to release. YSL was still a student, had never met Dior, and in fact no one had seen Dior’s soon-to-be announced work. The rest of the story goes that YSL’s teacher recommended him to Dior, who hired him immediately, because he really was a creative mind who could read the zeitgeist / had his finger on the pulse.
I love that story, loved the Gilbert anecdote in her book too, and I do think some people have that talent. I also think, as you pointed you, that in the self-help sphere there’s a lot of mutual inspiration and “yes, and” going around. Which is so great! But yeah, it also doesn’t hurt to mention where your inspiration comes from, especially if you’re someone with a fairly large following and who can help an artist who maybe hasn’t made it as big..
oooh that's a great story about YSL and Dior! Thanks for sharing.
The YSL story makes me think that we all get influenced by our times. I think everything collectively in the zeitgeist was pushing clothes in the direction that Lagerfeld and YSL were going. We get tired of what was before and move to the new thing and end up rallying around something. Miniskirts, wide leg, skinny jeans, whatever.
Culture influences us and we influence culture. It's a circle that feeds itself.
Wait I can't seem to find the book you're referencing, is it this one? Will you post a link or the full title if you get a chance? https://amzn.to/41ajZSr
Here’s the book: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/49098.The_Beautiful_Fall It’s very detailed, with no pictures (I did so much googling of collections..) but I LOVED it. I read it right after visiting the Dior and YSL museums in Paris and I got so much more out of my visits retrospectively.
The writing is also respectful both YSL and Lagerfeld even when Drake mentions their flaws, in case you share my pet peeve for catty biographies! (I’m still trying to digest that recent ‘Didion & Babitz’ book, but that’s another topic for another day haha)
Omg I just started the Didion and Babitz book on audio and it is RIVETING. But I’m only like an hour in…
Eek I’m sorry for barging in with my opinion on your current read in this case! I really look forward to hearing your thoughts on it. :)
Fabulous piece, Laura! I just found out about the controversy the other day.
A few thoughts:
If the roles were reversed and an unknown woman tried to publish her let them poem, after Mel dropped her widely successful book, people would have laughed at her for “taking Mel’s idea.” And she probably wouldn’t have been published.
Like it or not, I agree there’s some latitude for a person taking an idea already out there and repackaging it (based upon their fame).
To me, it seems quite obvious that Mel’s daughter said something (not unique) to her, “Let them,” and Mel realized she had a perfect new nonfiction sound bite. She did some research to find some factual basis for the theory, used some of her personal stories, and hired a team of great lawyers to get around any legal claim. She’s now bragging that her book was one of the largest nonfiction launches ever (heard her on Prof G) and will make a gazillion dollars. I’d be OK with all of this, as long as she gave a nod to that poem and its creator. She could have done all the same stuff I mentioned above and brought up another woman! But she didn’t, and to me that speaks volumes. With the help of all the lawyers money can buy (I’m a lawyer too, but I doubt Mel did IP Law, I don’t even know if she practiced long; if she didn’t do IP, she didn’t have the inherent knowledge, she hired it out) she ran with the idea and insulated herself from suit. Which to me makes her behavior kind of heinous.
It's so true that the "zeitgeist" argument doesn't work both ways. FOR SURE when people stumble across Cassie Phillips's poem now, they'll assume it's a ripoff of Mel Robbins' theory instead of ever jumping to the conclusion that the poem came first. It's been interesting to see people post the receipts on Cassie's work dating back to at least 2019, but I fear it won't matter much. Some machines are too big.
I was a little on the fence about Mel's work before, because I felt it was too ableist and just too "pick yourself up and wash your face" (no pun intended on the girl, wash your face as it relates to this piece). I'm really turned off by her now. The work feels hackish.
I agree with you completely. What is so off putting to me is that she failed to acknowledge Cassie in her book or in any podcast she's been on. I feel very differently about her now that I see more of her character (or lack thereof).
Remember when Antz and A Bug's Life both came out in 1998?! Was it competition or just great minds thinking alike?!
I'm loving all these difference examples that we remember. It's so funny what sticks with you!
Yes and the 2 movies about pigs in the 90s - Babe and Gordy. I was so confused about this as a kid.
Also Dante’s Peak and Volcano, The Prestige & The Illusionist, it appears this has been happening for as long as movies have been made: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_films
This is really encouraging to me. Just to know it’s a real and valid question for people like you who’ve published books and have lots of ideas that people listen to! I’ve been working on a book and recently found out about a book with a very similar title and basically the same idea as mine. I was devastated at first but my sister reminded me that my words need to be heard as well and my perspective will still be my own.
I like the concept that ideas will make it into the world regardless of who brings them into being!
yes please put your message into the world even if you think it's been done before. avoiding any type of plagiarism, of course, I really do believe that different voices speaking to a topic will land on the right ears to hear them.
Excellent essay and much to consider. I kept thinking about the Jo Jo Moyes and Kim Richardson plagiarism accusations while reading it. Also, I recall that Helen Keller was accused of plagiarism. Can’t remember the details, so sounds like my rabbit hole for the day.
oh wow I hadn't heard of this controversy but this is in fact quite juicy! Here's a deep dive for anyone looking: https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/tomiobaro/jojo-moyes-the-giver-of-stars-kim-richardson-bookwoman-of
Maybe Robbins felt that the theory she built upon Cassie’s foundation was worthy of sole credit. It seems so simple to provide a credit, a mention (or even an honoring) of the original poem, and a small percentage of profits. It also seems like that sort of generosity or abundance mindset would align with the type of work Robbins promotes. I wonder how Fair Use laws come into play, if at all. I also wonder who was advising Robbins; what role did the publisher play in the decision not to credit Cassie?
I think one of the things that bothers me the most about this one is the genre it falls into. On the one hand, self-help ideas are VERY zeitgeist-y and a lot of people end up creating similar messages. On the other hand, you're right that withholding credit (even just a small nod) seems in opposition to everything else about Mel Robbins's brand. (And the love and light of personal development and inspirational books in general.)
A cynical part of me wonders if this was intentional so that the internet would blow up about it and Robbins would “let them”.
I have often pondered this, when a thought occurred to me and then I started to see other people posting similar things online. Were we all guided to the same thought path by the similar sources we were reading? Did I read someone else's tweet about it, forget, and claim the thought as my own? Is it just the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon? I have also seen influencers start seamlessly incorporating ideas that I mentioned in their comments (for example, comparing a certain decluttering method to gardening) that I hadn't heard them mention before and wondered if they stole my idea without even a shoutout... and then been appalled at my own delusions of grandeur.
Oooh this IS a juicy topic! I started reading the Robbins book, caught wind of the controversy, and then returned my library hold b/c something felt icky about the situation. Your thorough research here affirms for me why I didn't want to read the book. To me, there is a level of specificity to both the content + the trademark attempt, that makes me feel like this IS a stolen idea—or, at least, the ex-journalist in me would have felt too guilty to pursue it had I been in her shoes! An equivalent in my mind would be like, her putting out a book called "Good Bones" and then claiming she had never read or heard of Maggie Smith's poem by the same name.
Regardless, I hope we bring this up when we meet to discuss Colored Television, because THAT is a book that presses its whole mulatto hand down on the topic of "who got there first" re art and ideas.
This will DEFINITELY come up in our Colored Television discussion!
I really like thinking about this! (I also love that you are writing more essays!) It is hard not to notice these trends and of course there have been times when I have rolled my eyes to myself when someone's work seems to be piggybacking off the "trendy" things being published. But, I have also noticed times when several similar ideas are published in books or podcasts at virtually the same time. It does seem that sometimes there is an energy of some sort that points people in the same direction of learning. As a person of faith, I notice this a lot in the Christian writing space. When this happens in any arena, I just pay attention. It seems like there is an idea that is trying to push forward and I probably have something to learn from it.
I love this generous way of thinking about it, that sometimes it's the idea itself that wants to be seen, known, and shared, and the details of who is spreading the message is arbitrary. That tracks with what Elizabeth Gilbert was saying, too.
I have wondered about this for television. Three shows about firefighters all of a sudden? Weird. I also love that idea from Big Magic that these ideas are circling around trying to find a willing partner to come to life. It also makes me wonder are ideas bigger than credit? Native Americans had no concept that land could be "owned". Maybe it's the same for ideas? We are the stewards of the ideas - not the owners. Credit is slippery because ideas are bigger than that. But to the Mel Robbins' point, she absolutely should have given credit. Cassidy should have been next to her in the Oprah interview. Honoring your inspiration doesn't take away from your authorship.
Sorry - Cassie! Autocorrect got me
Longform Laura is great and thought-provoking. I love this Substack. Have you read Austin Kleon's Stealing Like An Artist? It's so good and all about how our ideas are resting on the backs of our mentors--that it's OK and part of the creative process because we are all unique and so our creations can't be identical. BUT in this case, MR surely had to be aware that someone else had coined the phrase. Yes, she makes it her own, but an acknowledgment would be gracious and transparent so we trust her work. On the other hand, I don't think it's uncommon for us to absorb ideas and sayings that are already swirling around in our circles of personal and online influence. It's kind of like when we spend a lot of time with certain people, we might begin using some of their language, accent, or body movements without even trying. Since we live in an age of constant information coming at us, I bet it happens more than we think. For example, the idea of 20-minute reading timers has been around for decades among educators. There are even bookmarks with timers on them to encourage kids to read etc. etc. To my knowledge, you're not in teacher circles, but good ideas come to smart people and you have your unique LT version of it which is good and inspiring. I like where you land--being generous with ideas, sharing them, not coming from a place of scarcity, but abundance. I hope MR reads your article.
I did not know that about teacher reading timers but I love it!
Laura this was such an excellent, nuanced take. I've sent it along to my writing group and many others. I've had sort of the opposite worry in my writing career. Meaning--I've been writing about friendship since 2014, long before some of the newer books have come out. It was always an internet column in the first 7 years, then in 2021 I started the podcast, Dear Nina. But because I never put my ideas in a book, I always worry that the newer, bigger-name authors will think I lifted something of theirs in episodes, etc. Meanwhile, I've been writing about these things for over a decade!!
HOWEVER, there really is nothing "new" in the topic of friendship (as you know too!), which is why I would never accuse someone who wrote about friendship after I did of plagiarizing me. We all have our different styles of delivering common sense ideas. Still, every time a new friendship book comes out, I worry that someone will see ME as unoriginal despite my work coming first.
This is all just a long way of saying I think about these things a lot, and I also think about that moment in Big Magic and how lovely it is that Gilbert and Patchett became friends and not professional rivals-- a lesson for all of us. (This is not to say that Cassie does not have genuine, rightful beef with Mel attempting the trademark. I think that whole thing could have been handled with attribution and permission from the get go and avoided this whole mess. Another lesson for all of us!)
It's so funny, Nina, I thought about the topic of friendship and my own book AFTER I'd already finished writing this piece and it was already so long I didn't include that commentary but yes, I definitely had these thoughts as "friendship" is having a zeitgeist moment.
I never thought it about it in terms of plagiary with The Life Council, more like worrying that there were too many books about friendship coming out all at the same time, and would my book get lost in friendship fatigue. So far so good 😂 and as you know, people remain eager to talk about these relationships.
YES! Thankfully people love the topic. I haven't run out of material in 10 years.
But I will fully admit that part of what keeps me from finally writing "that book" is how many already exist and continue to come out year after year.
I don’t listen much anymore but every year on her podcast GR sets an intention/hashtag for the year. Like go outside for 20 in (19)20. Write 24 in 24. I think she did the reading one a few years back too. (These are examples I don’t remember which year she did which) Just saying it wasn’t always about reading
Her ideas were also used again - maybe 10 years ago I read her book Better than Before, and learned a lot about habits. A few years ago the book Atomic Habits came out and I almost thought I had read the book before, because it was so similar to Gretchen’s. And as far as I know A.H. went on to be a much bigger success than hers, and I don’t think she was given any credit. But maybe they weren’t original ideas either? I don’t know. It’s all so interesting.
I didn’t love Mel’s book but I liked some of it - when I learned about the poem I was kind of disgusted and disappointed.
oh yes, I know Gretchen Rubin does these challenges and they're great! She's great. Also reading more (and reading challenges) are just not that original of an idea, there's no way on earth I would ever try to take credit for that.
I also love that part in Big Magic about idea transference. I heard Mel on Oprah’s podcast but the idea doesn’t resonate deeply for me maybe because I’m not at all a people pleaser. However I see all over the internet and even in South Africa and Australia how this concept is being loved by people and I am very sad that Mel didn’t credit or give a nod to Cassie. More importantly I love the way you wrote about this, Laura, with nuance and curiosity 🩷
A few years ago I created a campaign for our yearly trade show (beauty industry) called No Expiration Beauty that focused on beauty at all ages and it was very moving and powerful (and yes, I’m bragging but it’s true). The agency that executed it for us then went on to do a similar campaign for our competitor using my idea. This is also how it happens. Not everyone is ethical.
ooof that really sucks. i’m sorry that happened!